That was a quote from "The Gay Athlete" (term coined in his coming-out article in Sports Illustrated this week), Jason Collins, the first American professional sports player to announce that he is gay.
Collins has finally come out and made a life changing announcement that takes a lot of courage for anyone, and maybe even more so for someone in the public eye, especially when no one before him has done it.
There was an outpouring for support for this man since his announcement. Support, respect, and love has come from many on twitter, blogs, facebook. But with that also comes rejection and fear.
Watching this all unfold, I feel a lot of respect and pride for someone who would respect themselves enough to finally show the world who they are and stop hiding their natural beauty. It's wonderful that so many people have shown such support for him.
On the other hand, it also makes me absolutely sick to my stomach.
Wait, wait. Let me finish.
Why should we all feel this pride, for someone we don't know and will never meet, because he is finally taking the step to live his life as he chooses? Why should he feel blessed to have so many people stand behind him as if he did something wrong? Why are we treating him different, or like some kind of athletic anomaly, as if he isn't "normal", but we are showing support that he was able to come out and tell us that he is somehow different than the rest of us?
Why, in this day and age, is it still such a big deal for someone to tell us he's gay? Why does he still have to feel such anxiety leading up to telling us that he is gay, as if he has something to apologize for? Why does he feel he even has to share it, much less in a front page article in Sports Illustrated? Don't get me wrong, I admire that he did that, but what I'm saying is, isn't it sad that he has to go that route for something that should not be a big deal at all.
After all, straight people, at the age of realizing their sexuality, do not feel the need to announce, "Oh, mom and dad, I wanted to tell you that I think I am straight."
*gasp*
Now, don't get me wrong here. I have nothing but love for what Jason Collins has done here. He has opened the gates and paved the way, allowing more people, in professional sports or not, to come out and live their lives how they want without having to hide for fear of social and professional persecution.
But tell me this. Why the hell should he have to feel as if he has a secret that he has to finally confess?
Things have definitely gotten better over the past few years. This just being another step in reaching a place where there is no "different" because there is no "normal".
There has been an inherent fear for many athletes, in that by coming out openly about their sexuality, they are going to be alienated by sponsors, teammates, coaches. It has been surmised that such a leap of faith as telling someone who you really are, in this most private aspect of ones life, can be career ending in professional sports.
Then there's the fear that other straight men feel about having the gays in the locker room with them.
Everyone walks around stark naked in a locker room with no shame, right? After all, it's just us just heterosexual men in here, right? As long as no one looks at anyone else's junk, it's all good, right?
Who wants to smack someones bare ass in the locker room if they might perceive it to be more than a friendly, sportsman-like, platonic gesture. Obvs it's ok if both parties are straight. It's a completely heterosexual gesture.
Right? I mean, everyone does that, right?
Larry Johnson, fellow athlete, tweeted " Ppl ! this is nothing against Jason or homosexual's,all I'm saying is this don't belong in a man's locker room.", " here's a man that say he's attracted to other men. Now he's walking around a locker room with naked man.", "I don't judge anyone!! I have fallen short of the grace of Allah myself, but stop trying to make this acceptable."
Let's just get something straight here. (Bad pun? Too soon?)
Jason Collins was in the locker room with you all last week. Jason Collins was attracted to men last week. Perhaps not all of you chest pounding, hairy ass, pompus meatballs, but men nonetheless.
So...what changed? What's different now, compared to last week? You are, Larry Johnson. You are different now. You have changed, in your attitude towards him. Jason Collins is exactly the same person. Liberated now, feeling free but still cautious, but still the same person as last week.
Stop trying to make this acceptable?? Seriously? Actually, you need to stop trying to make this unacceptable.
When I am in a women's locker room, and there is a naked woman there, it makes me uncomfortable. I don't like to change in front of anyone. So do you know what I do? I take my clothing and I change behind a curtain. Because I have enough sense to realize that the lady who is naked is not the issue, I am. She has every right to change that way in a change room if she wishes. If I don't like it, then I need to take strides to remove myself from the situation and find a comfortable way for me to do my thing. I'm not talking about someone being inappropriate or harassing, I am simply talking about normal change room behaviour.
But if I am in a locker room, I have literally no indication of who is gay or straight. Unless someone is winking inappropriately at me across the room, how would I know? And what does it matter if there is a gay person there? If the thought makes me uncomfortable, then the problem is me, and I need to rectify it myself.
If those men don't like having a gay teammate in the locker room with them, then my suggestion is to wrap a towel around yourself, have some curtains installed, and change in privacy.
And just a heads up to all the small minded assholes like Larry Johnson, do you really think for one second that Jason Collins in the only gay person in your league, even possibly on your team? They might not be out yet, they might not be farting rainbows for all to see, but that doesn't mean that they don't find men attractive. So if you have a fear of a man checking you out, then you need to buy yourself a robe or stay in your house.
Jason Collins is a free agent right now, at 34 years old. He has had sponsorship offers already since his announcement, and he finally decided to "stop pretending the sky is red".
Good on you, Jason.
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