On New Year's Eve, I can't help but feel a little reflective over the past year. And really, what choice do we have, when everywhere we turn, we are seeing blogs about "How to be a better person in 2014", "How to let go of mistakes you made in 2013", "13 foods that you were not eating in 2013 because they caused cancer that will now be cures for cancer in 2014".
Ok, that one may be made up, but you get the idea. And let's be honest, it's really not that far of a stretch.
Carcinogens, anyone?
Sometimes I think these bloggers are coming up with any old sappy "better yourself" and "what you're doing wrong" posts just in the hopes that their blog will go viral, making them famous for 5 minutes. And though we aspire to the "15 minutes of fame", it's now harder than ever since it has been reduced to 7 seconds, thanks to vines. I mean, perhaps on some level, we all have hopes of being the next big thing with a guest appearance on Ellen and some fancy blogging job for her after you return from your dream honeymoon that she will obviously send you on. But I will not sell out my blog in an attempt to gain one-time viewers and a few shout-outs on more reputable blogs.
So on that note, I welcome you to my 2013 List of the cutest puppy pictures that will make you cry for sure, so grab some tissues, because you will need them. I made sure that each picture has an inspirational little quote showing how you can make yourself a better person while making you quietly feel guilty for yelling at your kids and resolving to be a better parent and do volunteer work in 2014.
Um...yeah. *cough*
That's probably not going to happen. Although if you visit Pinterest, I'm sure you can compile your own list of bad-parent-shaming good-parent-empowering posts.
2013 has made me more tolerant, slower to judge and quicker to help. It was a year that has made me realize that there are bigger things in life than our #firstworldproblems. Granted, I'm still awkward, and I'm really not good in social situations. I'm still not organized, and I'm late for everything I've ever tried to attend. I still have a very misplaced sense of personal style that I can't quite get right, and we still have very few friends that we socialize with on a regular basis. I am not quite as patient as I'd like, and I still gossip now and then, although that is an area I've been working very hard on. I'm still somewhat of a hypochondriac, and I say stupid things that I know are stupid, but my mouth and brain are not connected at times. I'm still overweight, which is a goal of 2014 (, and 2013, 2012, 2011, 2010......1998....). I still spend too much money and long for vacations on the beach and new boots, and new clothing....
But all of those are minor things. I've learned so much more in 2013 that have taken me 30 years to figure out. For one thing, planning for the future for ourselves and our children is much more important and being able to visit fancy restaurants and buy expensive clothing. We have been working on education funds and retirement plans for a few years now, but I think this year it finally began to take it's place as a priority in my line of thinking.
I've realized that although I'm undoubtedly going to make errors in judgement in relationships and friendships, and those relationships help to make me who I am, they do not define me. I can only be defined by the way I treat others and myself, and the way that I live those relationships. Simply being a part of them is not enough, I have learned that I have to work at them, and make them something worthwhile.
Over this Christmas holiday, and leading up to it, I really learned how good it can make you feel to help someone, even when you can't actually see the people you are helping. In previous years, we have given some boxes of Kraft Dinner to the food bank, and probably donated a thing or two to the Happy Tree to be distributed to needful families. Every bit helps, and that was awesome. This year, as a family, we decided that we wanted to go a step further than we ever have. It was important to us, and helped us grow together. We felt that we could do more, and it felt good. What we donated or participated in is not important. But to donate anonymously is an awesome feeling. I realized that I don't need anyone to tell me "thanks" to make me feel good about what we were able to contribute, because you never know when it may be you accepting those donations. Life is funny that way. Hopefully next year, we will still be in a position to help make other people's Christmas's, and even daily life, a bit easier in our own hometown.
I've also realized that sometimes there are areas in life where you will walk alone, and you may feel that you are not encouraged to share you thoughts on things. I have been very judgemental in the past about certain issues, and I now see that being judgemental makes me no better than those who show intolerance in the things they say, post and share on social networking. Bullying was a strong point in 2013, and sometimes those who are the first to speak up against bullying, use outlets such as religion to condemn others for things that are out of their control, which can also take the form of bullying.
I walked into a church this year, for the first time in far too long, and found that it meant something to me. For a very long time, I've fought against religion on a personal level, always wanting to be something, anything, else. I really held a strong discord against organized religion. I studied Wicca, I thought I was perhaps an atheist, although I always knew that wasn't quite right. I always felt there was something else out there, but never knowing what, I never belonged anywhere. And it bothered me. I always felt like I believed in a god, but disliked the messages that churches were sending, so strongly, that I knew I could never feel at home in a place that disregarding other humans as being sinners simply because of a sexual orientation, or something else that was equally out of their control. My own strong opinions on certain matters just didn't mesh with those of organized religion. I could never feel at home in a house of hypocrites that preached that their saviour was the only judge, but yet, they judged other humans all the time. When I stepped into the church back in May, it was not for myself. It was not to find something I was missing, it was simply to give it a try to please others. I went with a feeling of contempt and disregard. It was never about finding myself or starting a journey. But I surprised myself, and I found something that I didn't expect. I found a place where tolerance was their motto and acceptance was their creed. I found myself eager to learn and explore. I promise you that I am not going "all churchy" on you all, because it's a very personal thing which this is not the place to share, but I am just glad that I was able to find what I was missing, when I'm not sure I even realized I was missing it.
I've learned that you really never know how someone from your past can play a very important role in your future. So you should be patient and kind, and try not to judge someone too quickly. When I worked at Tim Horton's, one of the part time bakers there was very nice, although I didn't know him well. I knew he was going to be a minister and was waiting to get married. 9 years later, I walk into a church for the first time in too long, and find that very same guy, up at the front giving a sermon that would really reach me.
2013 was about many things to me and I can't wait to see what 2014 brings me. I know this isn't a usual witty lighthearted blog post, and although certainly not worthy of viral re-posts and shares, I felt like there were some things that I just wanted to say. I feel very blessed to have some regular readers, and I love it when I randomly hear that people follow my blog and love to read my posts. Nearly every time I post something, I wonder if I have "jumped the shark" or completely missed the mark, which I undoubtedly will from time to time. I think it's really cool to have a few following my thoughts, because as the blog name says, it really is everyday common nonsense, and I know that some days are more nonsensical than others, and some days I barely string sentences together to come up with something worthy of your time.
So my resolutions for 2014 are this:
I will try to post more frequently on my blog. So if some days are garbage, I apologize in advance!
I am going to work on my time-management and punctuality.
I am going to lose weight. Again.
I am going to try to make my family healthier in body, mind and spirit.
I am going to try to make myself healthier, in body, mind, and spirit.
I am going to house train that damn poodle.
I am going to get outside more, and spend quality time with my kids.
I am going to try to contribute to my community a little bit more.
I am going to cook more and eat less crap.
I am going to work on my business more, and set myself some realistic goals. Then I am going to follow through on said goals.
So when the ball drops tonight and the fireworks light up the sky, and Auld Lang Sine rings out across the night air, I hope you all find someone that you love and place your hopes and dreams for 2014 together with theirs. Every single one of us deserves our hearts desires, and may you all find it in yourselves this holiday season. Happy New Year, may you have a wonderful, healthy, happy and prosperous 2014.
